Free Radical Thinking

FertilityTies Launches (www.FertilityTies.com)

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 13:18:00 +0000

New Social Media Site Launches for the Fertility-Focused:

FertilityTies.com to Unite Members and Experts for Information Exchange and Support, Offline Event Scheduled for June 6, 2009 at The Hilton New York Hotel

New Fertility-Focused Social Media Site Offers 24/7 Support and a “community” for those TTC (“trying to conceive”) & Faced with Infertility, June Event to Add Personal Touch to Online Community

April 1, 2009 - Los Angeles, California – FertilityTies, a new social media site and online community, launched today to provide those faced with infertility and those trying to conceive with the opportunity to connect with peers and medical experts. Now more than ever, in the wake of “OctoMom” and in the midst of a recession, patients want to assure that they select a respected physician with credentials and referrals, that they make wise choices for the sake of health, family and finances. Many of these patients, aggravated by extensive online searching for answers from multiple sites, can now find everything that they are looking for in a singular destination; FertilityTies is a community and social media site for everything pertaining to fertility.

The site, http://www.fertilityties.com/, offers: daily medical information, access to Q&As answered by respected MDs, the option to journal about one’s experiences and hear from others in similar situations, a live chat, fertility-focused polls (i.e. “Should infertility treatments be government regulated?”), a physician directory with patient testimonials, and more, including tools and charts to be unveiled in the coming months.

“Assisted reproductive technologies are an amazing innovation and fertility treatments have come a long way, but recently the subject has been linked with controversy,” said Veronica Alvarez, Founder and CEO of FertilityTies, referring to Nadya Suleman (the tabloid-magnate mom of octuplets) and to women over the age of 50 undergoing risky IVF treatments. “We want our members to be aware of respected physicians with high success rates and completely ethical approaches. We hope to arm our members with helpful tools that are available on a single site rather than in multiple destinations, and to lead them to information regarding cost-effective and medically effective treatments.”

FertilityTies, prior to its launch, has had over 25,000 questions and over 250,000 comments posted. Users hail from the U.S., India, the U.K., Canada, Australia and across the world. Despite difficult economic times and the fact that the site is still in Beta mode, over 50 members have already committed to attending the June event, including Sarah Rice of Hartford, CT, who is helping to plan it.

“Fertility Ties has introduced me to a wonderful group of women and doctors in the fertility world who have taught me about ovulation predictor kits, what a cycle day is, but most importantly I was able to connect with other women who have had the same experiences as me,” said Rice. “The support and guidance I received from this online community during one of the most difficult times in my life, having suffered from two miscarriages, is invaluable. I found support from Dr. Q who took the time to answer my questions once I did achieve a healthy pregnancy. And the friendships I have made will last a lifetime."

FertilityTies June 6th event will take place at The Hilton New York Hotel, located at West 53rd Street and Avenue of the Americas, where assisted reproductive technologies will be discussed and members’ questions will be addressed by a panel of physicians. Alvarez says that she hopes the event, which will cover topics such as “Male and Female Infertility”, “Secondary Infertility & Ethics”, and “Acupuncture & Fertility”, will allow members to bond and get the reassurance they crave from top medical experts, bridging the divide between access to online information and information that can be obtained in the real world.

About FertilityTies and Veronica Alvarez, Founder & CEO

FertilityTies (www.FertilityTies.com) was founded and created by Veronica Alvarez, an accomplished professional with an extensive business background. While she herself has not undergone fertility treatments, she is passionate about online communities and “building products that help make the world a better place.” She has over 12 years of experience creating, building, and running some of the largest communities on the web, having worked with Yahoo! En espanol, Yahoo! Personals, Yahoo! Avatars and many other sites.
"I truly believe that by empowering people through access to information, a difference can be made, and what better community to build than one that is based on family values and a desire to have a family regardless of your gender, religious background or sexual orientation."
Alvarez’s desire to create FertilityTies arose not only from being touched by the lives of friends faced with infertility, and from meeting fertility specialists like FertilityTies’ Rudy Quintero, MD, but from a desire to serve markets that can greatly benefit from social media and Internet technology. Alvarez realized that she would like to help this particular growing niche (infertility is on the rise worldwide) to gain access to desired fertility information, and help them to avoid frustration from controversial items that appear in the media.

About Rudy Quintero, MD
Dr. Rudy Quintero, a Reproductive Endocrinologist in Los Angeles, is the key 24/7 medical expert who answers members’ questions on the site. (Note: He will not dispense medical advice, make a diagnosis or suggest treatment through the site).
Says Alvarez about Dr. Quintero: “He has been working with our members on a daily basis, providing information free of charge to those who were not his own patients in an effort to empower them with information. He’s a strong patient advocate who has already begun bringing new members to the site through his careful and competent responses to the questions posed. We see him as our pillar, someone who will be instrumental in the community’s continuing success.”

To connect with Dr. Quintero and other medical experts, to find out about the June FertilityTies’ event, and to learn more about the site, go to http://www.fertilityties.com/.
*The information on FertilityTies.com is for informational purposes only. The site does not provide any medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.*

March 15th Jewish Genetics Program at KJ

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 02:23:00 +0000

Nishmat’s Miriam Glaubach Center Presents

Knowing Your Jewish Genetic Heritage: Awareness for the Sake of Your Children & Their Children (A Medical & Halachic Discussion)

Program to take place Sunday March 15th, 10:30am-12:00pm at Congregation Kehilath Jeshurun in Manhattan

Monday, March 2, 2009 – On Sunday, March 15th, Nishmat’s Miriam Glaubach Center, which provides resources and programs across North America for individuals, families, synagogues and mikvaot on topics of Taharat Hamishpacha (laws related to women and mikvah) and women’s health, will present a Jewish genetics symposium entitled “Knowing Your Jewish Genetic Heritage: Awareness for the Sake of Your Children and Their Children (A Medical & Halachic Discussion).” The event will take place from 10:30am to 12:00pm at Congregation Kehilath Jeshurun, 125 East 85th Street in Manhattan.

The Nishmat program offers a unique opportunity to hear from medical and Halachic experts about genetic testing and the Halachic implications of certain modern-day medical procedures. In light of recent news related to Jewish genetic diseases (e.g. the revelation that Mumbai’s terror victims Rabbi Gavriel and Rivka Holtzberg had children who were afflicted with Tay Sachs disease) and fertility treatments (the California “Octuplets,” egg donation becoming more prevalent in light of harsh economic times), issues surrounding genetics and fertility are once again prominently in the media spotlight.

The March 15th program will consist of a panel discussion led by Susan Gross, MD, Chairperson of the Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology at North Bronx Healthcare Network and Jacobi Hospital, and Yoetzet Halacha Atara Eis, a Halachic advisor in the area of Taharat Hamishpacha. Eis is currently on staff at nine synagogues throughout Manhattan and Kemp Mill Synagogue in Silver Spring, MD.

Gross and Eis will discuss issues that include: the Halachic background related to encouraging genetic testing, the preferred model of testing for Jewish genetic diseases and how to keep testing a private matter in order to prevent stigmatization. They will also touch on Halachic issues related to In-Vitro Fertilization (IVF) and Pre-implantation Genetic Diagnosis (the process of screening embryos so they are deemed healthy prior to implantation during IVF).

To find out more about this program and other programs of Nishmat’s Miriam Glaubach Center, call 212-983-6975 or email mgc@afnishmat.org.

About Yoatzot Halacha
Yoatzot Halacha are chosen for their extensive Torah scholarship, leadership ability and deep religious commitment. To become certified, each Yoetzet devotes two years (over 1,000 hours) to talmudic and halachic study at Nishmat: The Jeanie Schottenstein Center for Advanced Torah Study for Women in Jerusalem. There they also receive training from experts in modern medicine, psychology, gynecology, infertility, women's health and sexuality. Following comprehensive examinations administered by a panel of distinguished Roshei Kollel and Poskim, graduates of Nishmat’s Keren Ariel Halachic Institute are awarded the title of Yoetzet Halacha.

Since the first graduating class in 2000, more than fifty women have been certified as Yoatzot Halacha. Many serve Jewish communities across Israel and North America and are available via phone or internet to women all over the world. They have answered thousands of questions in connection with the observance of taharat hamishpacha and on topics of women’s health.

To read more about Yoatzot Halacha and the issues they address, visit www.yoatzot.org and www.jewishwomenshealth.org. To contact a Yoetzet Halacha directly, call Nishmat’s Golda Koschitzky Halachic Hotline toll-free at 1-877-YOETZET or visit www.yoatzot.org to send an email. Every call and email is anonymous and confidential.

About Nishmat’s Miriam Glaubach Center
Nishmat’s Miriam Glaubach Center was established in 2006 through a generous grant from Drs. Miriam and Felix Glaubach to enhance women’s observance of the laws of taharat hamishpacha and bring the expertise and compassion of Nishmat’s Yoatzot Halacha to Jewish communities across North America. Programs include Shabbat scholars-in-residence and Yoetzet-in-residence workshops, taharat hamishpacha “refresher” courses, Women’s Health and Halacha Days, and other classes, lectures and programs tailored to individual community’s needs.

Crain's New York Business Article that quotes me

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 02:21:00 +0000

Can we swing it?; Baby boom may be ending as parents wonder if they can afford childrenBYLINE: Miriam Kreinin SouccarSECTION: BUSINESS LIVES; Pg. 27LENGTH: 783 words
Nearly every night, the dreaded Excel spreadsheet comes out.
Shira Weiss and her husband turn to the computer program over and over again to recalculate their household budget. They aren't trying to figure out whether they can afford a larger house or a new car. They are trying to make what they once assumed would be an obvious decision: whether to have a third child.
Both Ms. Weiss, a public relations consultant, and her husband, director of sales and marketing at a dental imaging company, still have jobs. But fear over the worsening recession is putting them into a prepartum depression.
``We always wanted to have three kids, but there's that question mark hanging over the economy. We don't know if it's going to get better or worse,'' says 35-year-old Ms. Weiss. ``So here we are wondering, is a third child a luxury item?''
The great baby boom of the 21st century may be coming to an end. After more than five years of Bugaboo stroller traffic jams on sidewalks from the Upper East Side to Westchester, the economic crisis is putting a damper on procreation. Though it's too early to know if birthrates are actually going down, many families are rethinking their plans to have a third or fourth child, or even a first. In a city where expensive fertility treatments and adoption are more common because many women put off conceiving until they are older, the decision to proceed right now is even more vexing.
``the current economic climate has brought more focus on the high cost of raising a child to age 18 and then putting a child through college,'' says Susan Newman, a social psychologist. ``As more and more people lose jobs, couples are being forced to think hard before they add to their families.''
Fertility rates typically fall in times of economic uncertainty. During and after the Great Depression, women went from having an average of three children during the previous decade to two for the first time in U.S. history. And following the 1973 recession, birth rates fell to 65.0 per 1,000 people in 1976 from 68.8 in 1973, according to the National Center for Health Statistics.
The downturn in the New York City area--where large families have become a status symbol for the wealthy in recent years--may be even sharper because costs for housing and school are higher here than in many parts of the country.
``One of the perks of being an upper-middle-class family in Brooklyn or Manhattan was to have kids and send them to private school,'' says William Frey, a demographer at the Brookings Institution. ``Those folks may be especially hard-hit and will probably delay [having] kids for the short term.''
Tammy Kahn Fennell, vice president of VintageRareStuff.com, has been married for three years and was planning to start trying to conceive. But since the recession started, the 27-year-old and her husband have become too scared to take the plunge.
``Businesses go out real fast in this market, so I need to be working at 100%,'' Ms. Fennell says. ``If I had to go on bed rest or something during the pregnancy, I don't think we could survive at this point. And then, of course, there's paying for the baby, too.''
Difficult decisions
the already difficult decision is even harder for people who want to adopt or have to go through lengthy and costly fertility treatments.
Ms. Weiss turned to IVF to get pregnant with her second son and will need to repeat those treatments if she decides to have a third. The whole process costs at least $30,000.
Publicist Becky Fawcett and her husband spent their life savings of $200,000 on fertility treatments and finally adoption fees to become parents. Their son is now 3, and they are trying to adopt another baby. Luckily, they paid 90% of the adoption fees for their second child before her husband, who worked for Bear Stearns, lost his job.
``If we had to pay that money today, having a second child would have had to go on hold,'' Ms. Fawcett says. ``It would kill me right now if what stood between me becoming a mother again was money.''
The battle between the bank account and the biological clock is creating disagreements in some marriages, even among couples who can conceive naturally.
Sarah Caron, a freelance writer and editor, is anxious to have a third child soon. Her husband, a manager at an electronics store, thinks two might be enough, especially now.
The couple talks about the subject often, and Ms. Caron even coaches her 1-year-old and 3-year-old to nod their heads in front of their dad when she asks them if they want a new sibling.
Despite the worsening recession, Ms. Caron is confident she will win out. ``I'm sure we'll work it out somehow in my favor,'' she says. ``My goal is to start trying again by summer.''

Teaching Toddlers

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Sun, 18 Jan 2009 12:56:00 +0000

I have a toddler at home and I find myself often saying "No...", "You're going to go to time-out," "Don't take your brother's toys." For the most part, he's great - adorable, surprising every day (in a good way) with new words that escape his lips and intrigue me. But he's an explorer and he likes to push all of our buttons from time to time. So again, I turned to the "Moms on Call" to get some tips on how to handle the tantrums and other troubles with toddlers. In addition to the below tips, you can get a full and incredible tutorial in their Online Toddler Seminar at http://www.momsoncall.com/ :

"Three point teaching techniques

On an incident by incident level, there is a way to keep our cool and go beyond just saying “No”.
This is the 'teacher' part of being a consistent trustworthy role model. Just saying 'no' leaves a toddler to try to develop appropriate coping mechanisms on their own, and typically they will not do that.

They say to themselves. 'Michael took my toy. I am not happy about it and it makes me want to bite him' If we just say 'no,' we are leaving out an important aspect of the parent/child relationship; the teaching part. Here is where the three point teaching technique comes into play. We can go beyond a simple 'no' and teach our children good coping mechanisms. When should Parents start these techniques? As soon as they see Defiant behaviors.

There are two primary behaviors

1) Accidental

2) Defiant.

Accidental behaviors like crying for accidentally falling is NOT a reason to use these methods. But a Toddler who looks you in the eye while doing something they know is wrong is exhibiting Defiant behavior.

Sometimes defiant behavior starts at 13 months, sometimes not until they are 2 or 3 years old.
When your child looks you in the eye and exhibits a defiant behavior, he/she is saying “Give me a boundary. Are you bigger and smarter than me? Are boundaries going to stay in place or not?”

Three point teaching technique

When toddlers do not get their way, or another child snatches their toy, they get angry or disappointed and they usually will cry.

Allow them to have a few minutes of cry time and encourage them to use words to express their feelings.

Suggest other ways of handling disappointment and anger. Toddlers will not be able to come up with good coping mechanisms on their own. The cycle of behavior modification is this:

Step one – Identify the unwanted behavior.
Step two –State the disciplinary consequence.
Step three – State the desirable behavior.

Try saying "It is O.K. to be sad that Michael took your toy, but it is not O.K. to have a fit. If you have a fit again, you will sit in time-out. Try using words and asking Michael for the toy back. Try saying ‘Michael, can I have my toy back?'” We agree that this sounds very ‘Pollyanna,’ but if you are consistent, your child will learn better ways of handling disappointment, sadness and anger.

As much as is realistically possible- be consistent; the misconception is “Well, I’ve been doing it two or three times and it has not worked.” That’s not enough. Be consistent a hundred times over. It is in a child’s behavioral DNA to regularly test their boundaries. We know it is not easy. Remember using the three point teaching technique is not the only time that we will address our child’s behavior. Do not gauge success based on whether or not the child continues to misbehave. Toddlers misbehave, it is their way of testing their boundaries; They want the boundaries to stay in place and they want to know that someone bigger and stronger than them is keeping them safe.

You are successful if the child does not like the immediate consequences of their actions.
Throw out the notion that the children all have to respond to the same discipline technique.
Use the cycle of behavior modification:

Step one – Identify the unwanted behavior.
Step two –State the disciplinary consequence.
Step three – Teach the desirable behavior.

Most importantly, when they misbehave again, follow through with your discipline. It makes you trustworthy.

After the discipline, offer forgiveness, offer a giant hug and move on.

These tidbits brought to you by Jennifer Walker RN BSN mother of 3, author, parent educator and co-founder of http://www.momsoncall.com/.
Jennifer is 39 and resides in Woodstock Georgia with her husband and three sons, Grayson 11 yrs. and the 8 year old twins, Hamilton and Bryce.

Outings with 1 Year olds

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 22:22:00 +0000

This blog post probably only applies to you if you're located where whether outside isn't frightening - brrr...as it is in New York! The first tip talks about an outdoor activity, so if you're in California, you might be able to implement it now.

This is what Jennifer Walker, pediatric nurse, mom of 3, and co-founder of "Moms on Call," http://www.momsoncall.com/, suggests regarding outings with 1 year olds. Walker is also an instructor in the online seminars that can be downloaded on the "Moms on Call" web site that are geared for parents of toddlers and parents of babies. I am currently in the midst of watching the "'Moms on Call' Online Toddler Seminar" and getting some great tips on handling tantrums with my "Terrible Two" year old.

And now...Let's hear from Jennifer:

"Outings with one year olds

There are some great inexpensive ways to entertain them as well as satisfy the inner explorer.

Taking a stroll on an outdoor trail gives toddlers a chance to explore but keeps them in sight. For the walkers, they amazingly will stay on the path. It is great because they can decide which direction to go - forward or backward and they love the chance to be the leader.

It is also fun for them to collect items from the trail such as leaves and rocks to make crafts out of later or simply for experiencing the enjoyment of picking up rocks and putting them in a baggie. This simple act will thrill most little ones.

Just be careful that none of those rocks make it in their mouth!

One year olds also enjoy botanical gardens. The local gardens provide great colors and textures. Take your one year old and let them feel the different textures of the leaves and flowers. Are they soft or scratchy? This is a great place to point out and identify colors and count how many flowers are on a particular plant..

Indoors, toddlers love opportunities to have some freedom, so going to the local tennis court with several tennis balls for them to chase and throw goes a long way and helps improve their coordination. You can also bring a beach ball and play with them on the large indoor court or indoor gym area. Bring some wipes for those crawlers so you can wash their hands when you are done."

Yoatzot Halacha Program Coming to Manhattan November '08

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 18:29:00 +0000

Women to Women Guidance for Observant Jews

Issues of Jewish family law are so private and sensitive that some observant women have questions they keep to themselves. Preferring to “play it safe” rather than ask their male rabbi the most private of questions, these women often miss out on a simple answer or ruling that isn’t as stringent as they would assume. Others may not realize the need to be more stringent in certain areas of Halacha.

Recently, rabbis in Israel and throughout North America have partnered with Yoatzot Halacha, female advisors on matters of Jewish family law and women’s health. This initiative assures that female congregants and community members feel at ease seeking advice on intimate matters. The Yoatzot keep all questions in confidence and always consult with a rabbi for questions requiring rabbinic ruling.

Women preparing to become Yoatzot Halacha are chosen for their extensive Torah scholarship, leadership ability, and deep religious commitment. They devote two years (over 1000 hours) to intensive study with rabbinic authorities in Taharat Hamishpachah (Jewish family law).

Yoatzot receive training from experts in modern medicine, psychology, gynecology, infertility, women's health, family dynamics and sexuality.

To date, they have helped thousands of women enhance their observance of taharat hamishpacha, and find solutions in the areas of women’s health and Halacha.

Nishmat, The Jerusalem Center for Advanced Jewish Study for Women, graduated the first Yoatzot Halacha in 2000. Over 50 Yoatzot currently service Jewish communities in Israel and North America.

The success of programs in Riverdale, NY, Silver Spring, MD and Englewood, NJ has led to a new larger initiative throughout Manhattan offering Yoatzot Halacha as advisors to women in the community as well as spectacular lectures and learning programs (i.e. “Health & Halacha Day”).

The Manhattan initiative will officially begin November 21. On the Upper West Side, Lincoln Square Synagogue, The Jewish Center, Kehilat Rayim Ahuvim, Congregation Ramath Orah and Congregation Shearith Israel (Spanish & Portuguese Synagogue) have signed on. East Side participating synagogues are Congregation Kehilath Jeshurun, Fifth Avenue Synagogue, Congregation Orach Chaim and The New York Synagogue.

“The Yoetzet Halacha program is a great boon to women who are committed to Halacha,” said Rabbi Haskel Lookstein of Congregation Kehilath Jeshurun on Manhattan’s Upper East Side. “The availability of the Yoatzot to answer questions and to consult on a variety of sensitive issues that relate to nidda (a woman’s biological monthly cycle), mikveh (ritual bath), fertility questions and the like, can only enhance women’s religious commitment in general and, specifically, with regard to these and other related issues. I fully expect to give the Yoatzot a lot of ‘business.’ They are uniquely qualified for this purpose.”

Rabbi Stephen Friedman, rabbi of Congregation Ramath Orah on the Upper West Side added: “The mere mention of this program happening has created great excitement and anticipation at our synagogue. We are definitely thrilled to be a part of this.”

The concept of Yoatzot Halacha is widely gaining acceptance and generating further interest throughout other Orthodox communities in North America and Israel.

To find out more about the success of Nishmat’s Miriam Glaubach Center, Yoatzot Halacha, and how they are helping observant Jewish women, email sweiss@weissmediagroup.com.

Customized Vitamins

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 16:41:00 +0000

Customized vitamins are a new trend. Whether the focus is on healthy aging, tackling obesity or genetic predispositions, Americans no longer need to rely on Centrum and wonder if they’re getting what they really need.

Here are 4 companies that offer vitamins and nutritional supplements that have the individual in mind:

1) Suracell am and pm core supplements:

Given to you by an MD or medi-spa only, here's how Suracell works: You take a cheek swab and send your DNA kit to Suracell’s lab for testing to measure key healthy aging factors (i.e. blood sugar and body fat control), then a vitamin package is customized to suit your individual needs to age better.

Afraid to decode your own DNA? Simply opt for the core nutritional need supplements SANS the DNA test. People on this program tell me they have clearer skin, better concentration during hte day, higher energy levels, and have said “sayonara” to insomnia at night.

http://www.agebetternow.com/ offers a free month supply (just $13.95 for shipping & handling versus 69.95 for 30 day supply of am and pm essential genetic formula, comprised of over 70 vitamins, minerals, and enzymes combined with potent rainforest CAE extract for anti-aging). The DNA test is given out only by a Dr. or medi-spa: $190

Next up from Suracell? DNA-focused customized skin cream, to be announced.

2) Mitamins: Go to this company’s web site and it allows you to check off various conditions from bone and eye health to body odor (blech!) and customize a nutritional supplement program that’s ideally suited to your needs.

Mitamins’ team consists of physicians, nutritionists, biochemists and herbalists.

Cost depends on how much you kvetch - I mean, how may "conditions" you check off: i.e., monthly cost for a formulation based on Acne & Allergies & Anti-aging & Backache & Body Odor & Bone Health is $37.92 plus shipping and handling. No DNA test. http://www.mitamins.com/

3) Signature Supplements: No doctor visit or blood test, these supplements are designed for you on the basis of a questionnaire you fill out online. Unlike Mitamins which gives you boxes to check off, SS gives you multiple choice answers to choose from – This could signal a red flag to nutritionists, but the company says it tested over 20,000 individuals and has the method of personalized formulation downpat.

Their customers also rave about clearer skin, as well as PMS cures through this customized blend. What it will cost you: anywhere from $40 to $80 for a one-month supply, depending on the ingredients in your formula. http://www.signaturesupplements.com/

4) GenoTrim by Salugen: If the latest ban on fast food isn’t enough to keep your waistline in check, try getting a nutritional supplement made up for you to fight off predisposition to excess girth.

Like Suracell, Salugen offers a DNA test for GenoTrim, but unlike the former which measures healthy aging factors, Salugen’s DNA test for GenoTrim measures fat genes (Did you know there’s a “sweet tooth gene”?).

Cost for Monthly supply of vitamins: 99.95, The DNA test? A hefty 424.95. Now that will add serious weight to your wallet! http://www.genotrim.com/

The "F", the "S", the "C" and the "It" Word

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 01:13:00 +0000

(Photo Caption: "Dirty Mouth? Clean it Up!", Photo Credit: Orbit Gum)

I heard a great story from a dear friend of mine, a woman who is devout, sincere, overall a moral compass to any mom - who kicked a very NASTY habit a while back!

Here's her story:

"Once upon a time, before getting married, before having children, I developed a very bad habit of cursing. My husband never developed this bad habit and worked very hard to get me to give it up, espcially after our twins ( a boy and girl, now 6 1/2) were born. Over time, I actually did stop, I even got to the point where I was appalled at hearing other people's "salty" language.

One day this past summer, my oven had grease fire in it. When I open the door to see large flames, I screamed and a let an "S" bomb drop in front of my kids who ran into the kitchen after I screamed. As far as I can remember, this was the first time I did such a thing, and was utterly disgusted with myself. I called up my husband immediately to let him know what happened.

Later that day, in the car with my 4 children (the twins, a 4 year old son and a 3 year old daughter) a yelling match broke out between the twins. I was in overwhelming traffic and as I normally do, I ignored the yelling and focused on driving; until I heard the following exchange:

Daughter: "I'M SO ANGRY AT YOU I'M GOING TO USE THE S-WORD"
Son: "I'M SO ANGRY AT YOU I'M GOING THE F-WORD"
Daughter: "WELL I'M GOING TO USE THE C-WORD"
Son: "WELL I'M GOING TO USE THE IT-WORD" (he pronounced it as one word "it")

My stomach sank, I was sweating and feeling like the worse parent in the world, I began to wonder if I had actually been, unwittingly, saying other curse words in front of my kids. I was deliberating what to do, but the kids were pretty agitated and I needed to stop that.

I said to my son "I can tell you are really angry, but I am very upset that you want to used such bad language, I need to know where you learned it because I think it's from your favorite cartoons."

Son: "It's not"
Me (still sweating and nervous): "Well, I think I need to know what the words are so I figure where you learned them"
Son: I won't get in trouble I say it?
Me: "Not like this. Can you tell me what the F-word is?"
Son: "Fight"
(I had to start immediately holding back a giggle)
Me: "And the S-word?"
Daughter: "Stupid"

Me: (breathing heavy so as not to laugh at loud): "And the C-Word?"
Daughter: Kill
Me: And the it-word?
Son: Idiot.

We might need to work on their spelling, but their manners are ok for now."

Listen Up, Hand-Sanitizer Abuser Moms!

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 21:52:00 +0000

Jennifer Walker, RN, BSN, of the pediatric nurse & mom duo "Moms on Call" (you remember their book and the fantastic toddler seminar they offer online?! They will soon be offering a stellar online baby seminar!) recently shared her thoughts on being overprotective of our children and I had to extract some thoughts for the "Germaphobic Mom" and share it with you.
Jennifer Says:

"Can we hermetically seal our children in a bacteria free bubble?The scene is all too familiar - a typical household, happy children playing while the mom looks on in bliss. Switch to a close-up of the counter top and the animation of bacteria fe re stering and lying in wait to infect the clueless family with all sorts of unknown diseases. Cleaning up after ourselves is recommended especially after handling uncooked chicken or tracking mud into the living room. However, we have gone a few steps too far with antimicrobial everything including hand sanitizers in every room and antibacterial coatings on every surface. The medical community is just now seeing the result of the attempt to artificially sterilize our children's every experience.

MRSA, a bacteria previous known as a nosocomial infection (meaning it was almost exclusively seen after an in-hospital exposure) is now an increasingly common bacterial strain that has found its way into locker rooms, schools and basic public environments. In part, our germaphobic generation has stunted the natural progression of our children's immune systems. By underexposing them to common household germs, we have left them with a short-sighted immune response. The first five years, the body is on full developmental mode and all those annoying infections that children in daycare or public settings like church or temple encounter (6-10 infections on average every year per child under 3 between October and February alone) are the natural way to build a strong immune system.

Now no one is recommending purposefully exposing children to harmful bacteria or viruses, however, every object in our home does not need to be hermetically sealed. The hand sanitizer needs to be thrown out as it contains dangerous amounts of alcohol and could cause severe kidney and liver damage if swallowed even in small amounts and we just don't need a cabinet full of disinfectants to be good moms. Wash your hands and your kid's hands regularly with your good old fashioned soap and water - the scrubbing action is really what does the trick anyways - and do regular house cleaning. But there is no need to follow your child around with hand sanitizers, antibacterial soaps or waste time developing an anxiety disorder over the public restroom. Germs are a part of life and they have their own purpose in the overall scheme of things.".

In addition to working with "Moms on Call" and her role as pediatric nurse, Jennifer is a mother of 3, author, parent educator and co-founder of http://www.momsoncall.com/.

Jennifer is 39 and resides in Woodstock Georgia with her husband and three sons; Grayson 11 yrs. and 8 year old twins Hamilton and Bryce.

"Moms on Call" respond to "What's Going Around?"

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 13:54:00 +0000

(Photo credits: Moms on Call, pediatric nurses and authors of The Moms On Call Guide to Basicl Baby Care, online toddler and baby seminar instructors at www.momsoncall.com)

If you could hang out at your pediatricians office all day every day - Well, maybe you actually do - you'd be able to determine what's going around in terms of pediatric illnesses. You'd hear some tips on what to do to combat respective symptoms. However, since most of us do NOT have time to hang out in the pediatricians office for more than an appointment warrants, the "Moms on Call" have kindly put together a response to "What's Going Around."

As they write on their web site, "You spoke, we listened." So, here it is. The Moms on Call, two pediatric nurses who answer basic baby care questions and authored The Moms on Call Guide to Basic Baby Care hope that this information will be helpful to you and your children.

This resource is not to be used to diagnose your child. Only a qualified pediatrician can accurately manage your child's care. This information is intended as a resource, not a replacement for medical care. Some of the materials that you will find here are excerpts from their book series, which also includes Moms on Call Basic Baby and Toddler Care Volume 2: 6-24 months.

The "Moms on Call" write:

"Here is what is going around:

FEVER
“My 14 month old has a fever of 103 rectally.”
We get so many calls about fever. This is a misunderstood symptom. Our bodies are designed to fight off infection. One way that the body does that is to turn up the heat when a virus or bacteria is detected, hoping the bacteria or virus will not want to stick around if it gets too hot. So, mild fevers in babies over 3 months old can be quite beneficial.

It is also imperative that you are able to take an accurate temperature. When taking the baby's temperature, we recommend taking rectal temperatures exclusively until the baby is over 18 months old. That is the most accurate way to take a temperature. The ear thermometers, forehead thermometers and pacifier thermometers are just not as accurate in infants. We recommend using a B-D Digital Thermometer®.

In babies over three months old, normal rectal temperatures are between 97-100.5 degrees Fahrenheit. In babies over 3 months old, we would not consider their temperature a “fever” unless it was over 100.5 rectally. Temperatures may vary according to several factors, including activity level and times of day.

How to take a Rectal Temperature
-Lubricate the thermometer with a pea-sized amount of Vaseline®
-Lay infant on back as if changing a diaper.
-Lift legs so rectum is easily seen.
-Press button on thermometer to turn it on.
-Insert thermometer into rectum about 1⁄4 inch or until you can no longer see the silver tip of the thermometer.
-Hold thermometer in place 3 minutes or until it beeps. (Most digital thermometers only take about one minute)
-Remove and read thermometer.

Daytime Treatment
If over 6 months old, if irritable or fussy and/or not resting well, may use Tylenol or Ibuprofen
If under 3 months old, a rectal temperature of 100.4 or higher is reason to seek medical care.

Give extra fluids.
Fevers generally subside during the day and spike in the late afternoon. No need to treat a fever under 102.5 rectally unless the child is uncomfortable.

Treat the child, not the numbers on the thermometer. We are much more worried about a child that has a mild fever but is lethargic (like a wet noodle all day) than we are a child with a 104 rectal temperature who is running around like nothing is wrong.

Nighttime Treatment

Put child to bed wearing cool cotton clothing. No fleece zip-ups or warm blankets. Temperature of the home should be between 68-72 degrees.

If he/she wakes up and feels very hot, undress the child down to the diaper/underwear and give whatever fever control medicine is due next. DO NOT TAKE THE TEMPERATURE FOR 10 MINUTES. (The temperature will spike right when the child awakens. If we give the child about 10 minutes of being undressed, the fever will generally come down 1-2 degrees all on its own. This helps us to avoid a big parental breakdown over a 105 rectal temp.)
There is normally a wait at the ER and by the time you have given a child fever control medicine and arrived at the ER, the fever is under control. However, high fevers that are accompanied by other symptoms may need to be evaluated such as:

Neck stiffness
Bright red or purple rash that does not blanch or lighten with pressure
Persistent vomiting (more than twice)
Severe abdominal pain
Inconsolable crying greater than one hour
Difficulty breathing (not increased breathing; respirations will be increased when they have a fever.)
Severe headache
Seizure activity – violent shaking

When to Seek Medical Care
If more than 6 months old, if the temperature >103.5 rectally, call your pediatrician
A baby under three months old with a rectal temperature over 100.4
A baby with any temperature that is lethargic (like a wet noodle) all day. Any child that is not having at least 20-30 minute periods of playfulness at any temperature can be a sign of illness.
Ask your pediatrician for a fever handout.
Fever accompanied by other symptoms such as, but not limited to: a rash, vomiting, decreased movement of a limb, difficulty breathing, inconsolable crying longer than an hour or an abdomen that is hard like a table when the baby is at rest.

Febrile Seizures
These are generally harmless and are a result of the fever going up too fast, not the fever getting too high. These may last 1-3 minutes. Usually febrile seizures begin at 6 months to 2 years old, with the first seizure occurring by the time the child is 2 years old. They normally stop by the time the child is 5-6 years old. Febrile seizures generally will occur in the first 24 hours of fever. Only a pediatrician or emergency room doctor can adequately diagnose this type of seizure.
Treatment
Keep area safe.
Do not try to restrain your child. Once started, it will run its course no matter what you do.
Once the seizure is over and your child is awake, give usual dose of medicine. (Tylenol® or Ibuprofen)
Do not over-dress your child. When the seizure has subsided, holding the child too close to your body can also cause the child to get overheated, so be careful with the cuddling at this time.
When to seek medical care:

This is the first febrile seizure:
Lasts longer than 5 minutes.
Neck stiffness.
Confused or delirious.
Difficulty awakening.
Any seizure activity in absence of a fever.
Note: Tylenol® and Motrin® do not cure the cause of the fever. It is for comfort only. Once these medications wear off, the fever will come back until they are no longer sick. Often the child's temperature will not come all the way back down to normal. It can hover between 101-102 rectally in an infant over 3 months even with fever control medicines.

VOMITING
“My kid just threw up and I don't know what to do.”
Vomiting: large amounts of vomit, with forceful emptying of stomach contents, more than 2-3 times. Although there are various causes of vomiting, we see it most often associated with a gastrointestinal virus. These types of viruses usually start with vomiting every 30-45 minutes for the first 6-8 hours then maybe an isolated episode of vomiting on day two or three. Diarrhea will often accompany these symptoms and it lasts for 5-7 days. (See diarrhea section.)
Treatment:
Try to wait about an hour after the child vomits. Then you can try one tsp of clear liquids (water, Pedialyte) every 10 minutes for the first 2-3 hours while awake, with an occasional teaspoon of heavy peach syrup. (Now you know why we mentioned the peaches in heavy syrup in the general shopping list! It coats the stomach and helps the baby keep the liquids down.) You can then begin to increase the amount of fluids by adding another teaspoon every ten minutes for the next 2-3 hours. (One teaspoon, wait ten minutes, two teaspoons, wait ten minutes, three teaspoons and so on.) Sucking on popsicles or a wet washcloth is a way of ensuring that they are not swallowing too much at one time. A teaspoon of jello would be good. You can sit on the couch and give sips of clear liquids from a medicine dropper if you need to as well.

If the child goes 6-8 hours without vomiting try to breastfeed a limited amount, increasing as tolerated or use 1-2 ounces of formula every 30 minutes for 2-3 hours as tolerated.

If no vomiting after 12 hours, begin returning to a normal diet slowly.

If the baby vomits during any of above, return to step one.

Avoid giving medicines for 8 hours (with the approval of the pediatrician). If running a fever of 102 or more rectally, then use Fever-All® suppositories if permitted by your pediatrician.
If older than a year, no milk for 24 hours from the last time that they vomit. After no vomiting for 6-8 hours try starchy foods such as toast or crackers and gradually return to a normal diet.

Common Errors
-Giving too much fluid at one time.
-Not waiting the hour before beginning fluids.
-Sometimes when a gastrointestinal virus is causing vomiting in a child, no matter what you feed them or how often you feed them, the vomiting will continue. If your child is crying for fluids and it has not been an hour after vomiting, it is okay to give it, just try to have them drink slowly. (We realize that you only have so much control over how quickly they drink.) When they are experiencing these symptoms, it is crucial to monitor for the following additional symptoms.

When to Seek Medical Care
Signs of dehydration:
Not urinating at least every 6 hours. (You may want to place toilet tissue in the diaper to check for wetness because the absorbent nature of today's diapers makes it hard to tell if the baby has urinated at all.)
When you run your pinky finger over the inside of their bottom lip it is dry and tacky as opposed to smooth and moist.
Tries to cry but cannot cry tears.
Marked lethargy.
Unable to hold down one tablespoon of fluid after 2-3 attempts. (Remember to wait 30 minutes to an hour after each vomiting episode.)
Vomits blood
Neck stiffness
Rash
Vomiting that continues > 24 hours
Fever
Vomiting bile - fluorescent yellow or green goo.
Abdomen hard and tender at rest (hard like a table top, as opposed to soft like a really full balloon).
Blood in stool (more than 1 tsp bright red blood)Call pediatrician if the child has a fever of 103.5 rectally or higher. (Or a baby under 3 months with a 100.4 or higher rectal temperature)

DIARRHEA
Diarrhea can be caused by a gastrointestinal virus and can generally last 5-7 days. However, sometimes babies may have a day of diarrhea secondary to mild stomach irritation, and this will pass in one or two days.
Signs
More than 5 watery stools in a 24-hour period.
Relief measures
We do not like to give medication that claims to stop diarrhea for infants or kids under 2 years old. This is because most diarrhea is caused by a gastrointestinal virus that will run its course. We want the diarrhea to get out of the baby's system. This is the body's natural way of handling this kind of virus.
Infants
Formula Fed: May switch to Isomil DF® for a few days.
Breast-Fed: Continue to breastfeed. Breast milk is the gentlest thing for an infant's tummy.
Baby food for babies > 6 months old: Baby foods that are starchy are good choices, i.e., cereal, applesauce, bananas, carrots, mashed potatoes.
Children greater than one year old:
Water is the best fluid for your child with diarrhea, unless they are not eating well, then you may use Pedialyte®.
After 24 hours, you may give milk as well as water. Exception--if this is the only thing they will drink, you may give fruit juice to keep the baby hydrated.
AVOID fruit juices. Exception--if this is the only thing they will drink, you may give fruit juice to keep the baby hydrated.
Solids--starchy baby foods (i.e., rice cereal, bread, crackers, rice, noodles, potatoes, carrots, applesauce, and bananas). Fatty foods are good as well.
Note: Regardless of how you feed diarrhea, it will generally run its course. However, it's probably not the time to get Mexican for dinner.
When to seek medical care
8 or more watery stools a day for 5 days.
Blood or mucous in stool.
Fever (ask your pediatrician for a fever hand-out)
Abdominal tenderness/hard at rest.
Any signs of dehydration:
Longer than 6 hours without urinating.
No tears when crying.
Inside of lips feel dry when you swipe your pinky finger along the inside of bottom lip.
Increased lethargy.
Note: Diarrhea is very contagious. All family members need to wash hands well after changing diapers and/or using the toilet.

[Important Info
Moms On Call recommends seeking medical care when you are concerned.
Any time that you are concerned, or notice any symptoms, call your Pediatrician's office. Sometimes babies have discreet symptoms like a fever, and other times there is just something that you can't explain, call it mother's intuition or a nagging feeling that something may be wrong. Those are both valid reasons to seek medical attention. Many of the concepts addressed in this website vary from Pediatrician to Pediatrician. When it comes to your child's care, you are responsible for making the final decisions.

The Moms on Call web site, http://www.momsoncall.com/, is designed to provide information on infant and child care. This website is intended as a reference volume only, not as a medical manual. It is offered with the understanding that neither the author nor the publisher are engaged in rendering medical, health, or any other kind of personal professional services on this website. The reader should consult the services of a competent pediatrician, registered dietician or other medical professional. The author and publisher specifically disclaim all responsibility for any liability, loss, or risk, personal or otherwise, to any parent, person, or entity with respect to any illness, disability, injury, loss or damage to be caused, or alleged to be caused, directly or indirectly, of the use and/or application of any of the contents of this website.

The website should be used only as a supplement to your pediatrician's advice, not as a substitute for it. It is not the purpose of this website to replace the regular care of, or contradict the advice from, the American Academy of Pediatrics, or any pediatrician, nutritionist, registered dietician, or other professional person or organization. This text should be used only as a general guide and should not be considered an ultimate source of child care, child feeding, food preparation/storing, or as the ultimate source of any other information. You are urged to read other available information and learn as much as possible about child care and the nutrition and feeding of young children. Mention of specific companies, organizations, or authorities in this website does not imply endorsement by the publisher, nor does mention of specific companies, organizations, or authorities imply that they endorse this website.

Every reasonable effort has been made to make this website as complete and as accurate as possible. However, there may be mistakes both typographical and in content. Therefore, this text should be used as only a general guide. You should discuss with your pediatrician the information contained in this website before applying it. This book contains information only up to the copyright date. New information, or information contradicting that which is found in this book, should be actively sought from your child's competent medical professionals.]"

Moms on Call will be launching their first ever, online Basic Baby Care Seminar in September! Learn the basics of feeding, sleeping and settling into a daily routine. Their proven method has helped thousands of families become more confident while getting their baby to sleep earlier.Sign up to receive the newsletter so you can be notified once this exciting class is live! contact me if you're interested in receiving the newsletter: Shira Weiss, sweiss@weissmediagroup.com

Users = Losers

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 20:32:00 +0000

[Pictured: (BELIEVE ME, you WON'T see these two pictured often on my blog) Sometimes "friends" sometimes frenemies, Hilton and Richie]

I can't say I blamed her for befriending me, with my affable personality, trendsetting style and professional "connections" - If I do say so myself, I am quite the catch - heterosexualy speaking. I would befriend me - but for different reasons (you see, I am also kind and caring and though it may not be entirely obvious in this post, a modest human being).

What I didn't realize until very late in our "friendship" was that she seemed to only be chummy when she was in need. A problem with her boss (disguised as a desire for a higher paying job) for instance, forced her to seek encouragement, reassurance, requests of me to put in a good word for her - to whomever. Then, just as suddenly as she caught me up in her whirlwind of popular girl-gum smacking-adult-high schooler-masquerading as careerwoman world, she dropped me like a hot potato. You see, I no longer served a specific need and frankly, she had no use for me.

I would love to say something to her, a sort of "I gotcha and totally know your game" and speak to her in the language she seems to know, cracking my own gum and smacking an L to my forehead. Instead, I sit here writing to vent my pent up frustrations. There's little point in confronting a user. If someone "befriends" you for their own personal gain, they won't really pay attention to what you say anyhow.

Baby's Cuteness: It's all "Relative"

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:49:00 +0000

(Cartoon baby courtesy of picasaweb.google.com)

I saw the below report on CBS television regarding babies and their "cuteness." Are all babies cute? The answer is "Yes." For a more in-depth explanation regarding the definitiveness of this assertion(despite the Seinfeld episode "You've gotta see the bayyybayyyyy" - in Long Island accented nasal tones), Read on:

(CBS) What is it that makes parents think their own babies are the cutest babies in the world? What makes them so unabashedly biased? CBS News correspondent Steve Hartman tries to explain the phenomenon, using his own personal fatherly experience - and his son, George.

Not long ago, we asked parents to send in pictures of both cute and ugly babies. Nearly 200 people sent in pictures of their supposedly adorable offspring, but not one parent copped to having even an average looking child. It's not right, since logic demands that half of all babies must fall in the bottom 50 percent of cuteness.

That's why, after my son George was born, I tried to maintain my journalistic integrity. Now, the older he gets, the more I fall in love with him, the more I find myself thinking like all the other parents. That's why I decided to find out once and for all, if my son is cute or not. As I expected, everyone said he was cute.

After showing people a picture of George, one said, "That is a cute baby! Look at those eyes!" "Look at the mouth!" one gushed. "Oh, the big smile," said another. The picture I originally showed people was an actual picture of my son.

Then I started showing an “uglified” version. Believe it or not, everyone still gushed over my little monster, although some more convincingly than others. "That baby is adorable,” one person tried to tell me. I responded, “Really?” “Oh, come on. Look at that smile … or the look." One person avoided specific features altogether: "He, ahh, ahh, his, ah his enjoyment of life is obvious!"

And so it went, no matter who I asked, or how ugly I made the picture. I couldn't find anyone who'd give it to me straight. I even showed a priest the picture. "Oh, good lord!" That's not an insect no?” was his first reaction. I replied, “No, that's a hairy mole. He's still cute though?"

Father said, "Oh, sure it is." At the risk of a lightening strike, I then asked Father Patrick if it's a sin to tell somebody there baby is cute when you really don't think it is. "That's not a lie,” said Father Patrick. “It’s not a lie?” I continued to question. “Oh lord no, I wouldn't. There's all the difference between a lie and what they call a mental reservation.” “Well, if that's true, then how do I know you think my child's cute?” I asked. Father politely replied. “Oh, I see, because he is! This baby's a really cute little baby. "

I was about to give up and that's when I thought of Maureen Walach. Maureen heads up Wilhelmina Kids, a child modeling agency. I showed her pictures of what George really looks like. Although at first, she too, couldn't help but be diplomatic, eventually, I got it out of her. "What are you looking for?” she asked me. “Honesty,” was my reply “That's what you got," Walach said. "He's cute" “It's OK, I've been looking for somebody to tell me the truth,” I reassured her.

“OK, the truth is the baby is very average! There you go!” she finally gave in. I now had the truth. “How come nobody else would tell me my baby is average looking?” I asked her. “Because now you hate me,” Walach said. "No I don't!" "I think you might," she said. After all that, I've come to the conclusion that cuteness is relative ... if the baby's your relative, it's cute.

(Source: http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/06/27/assignment_america/main4215938.shtml)

"How She Does It": 75 Multitasking Moms Weigh In

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 10:59:00 +0000

I’ve been told by friends and family members that there is a way to do it all. This happens when I complain that there aren’t enough hours in my day to do all of my PR work plus the necessary house cleaning before 3. That fine hour is when I hit the “pause” button on work, fetch my two sons from two opposite locations (daycare and school respectively), and plop them both down at the Thomas table upon returning home. While they play, I go back and hit “play” on work, resuming my tasks at around 4. I work, entertain them, make dinner (or pour cheerios) and scramble to pseudo-clean so it isn’t total chaos when my husband returns from his hour-plus commute.

“I’m sure there’s a way to fit in the cleaning too,” he suggests gently as I reflect on my busy work day. He says this rather cheerily as he picks off damp Honey Nut Cheerios from the backs of our kitchen chairs. He then tidies up and runs out to the grocery store before getting a chance to eat dinner.

I don’t “watch the clock” while working from my home office. I often inevitably go over the allotted number of monthly hours for each of my clients because I need to garner results - “results” being press coverage. Determined to be ever the uber-professional, I strategize, devise, rethink, write and rewrite, pitch story ideas and document all of that work.

Hence, there are not enough hours in my day.

In an effort to figure out a better way to manage my time (and help my poor husband out!), I interviewed 75 women who work, whether it be professional work or caring for a child (which, of course, is the hardest job) from home like myself.

During the course of my interviews, some common themes emerged: having a supportive husband (check! Got that.), learning to delegate (who to?), setting a timer to clean, then getting back to work and cleaning again (sounds like “lather, rinse, repeat,” and this occurs in 15 minute increments each), and keeping planners (one unbelievably organized “Alpha Mom” said she has daily, weekly, monthly and yearly to-do planners!).

Mia Redrick is a mom not unlike me, who started her own business and works from home. A self-described “very young 40,” this mom of three founded Finding Definitions, LLC, which offers coaching, classes and seminars “on topics relevant for a mother’s personal growth on her journey throughout motherhood.” She advises moms to “DIPP: Delegate, Incorporate, Plan and Purge.” Also the author of Time for Mom-me, 5 Essential Self-Care Strategies for a Mother’s Self-Care, Mia explains how these 4 steps get her through the daily grind:

- Delegate: ask family members to help with household chores or baby duty tasks.

- Incorporate others in your space; consider outsourcing laundry or household cleaning. Hire a mother's helper from the neighborhood to come over for a few hours to give you a hand.

- Plan by taking 15 minutes in the morning and considering what it is you would like to accomplish that day.

- Purge means getting rid of the unnecessary and learning to say “no” to what’s unrealistic or too much to take on.”

I liked Mia’s tips because, frankly, I’m fond of cute acronyms, but implementing the tips is not as realistic for me. My family members are all busy working (my dad’s a busy pediatrician and my mom, a high school principal) and I haven’t been able to find cleaning help that’s both economical and thorough.

I “purged” myself of a lunatic boss last year, but now I have myself to answer to, and catching myself for 15 minutes prior to morning prep (of getting the kids dressed and fed before bringing them to their respective places) is quite impossible: I like to sleep for as long as I can before my two year old crows “Mamma, Dadda” to the rising sun through (and despite) the darkest of blackout shades.

LiRon Anderson-Bell is a 38 year old married mother of two and busy owner of PR firm Crisis Contingency Partners (just hearing the name of her firm stresses me out). She is also a self-professed “soccer mom.”

“I run the agency out of a dedicated space in my home,” says LiRon, and I realize that she and I have something in common. I start to wonder if her laptop charger cord is tangled up with that of her husband’s, and if press kits sit to the right of her desk with an oversized Elmo at her feet. “I have a hard stop to my work day at 3pm.” I marvel that there’s someone similar to me, experiencing that same mad dash to get it all done by 3. LiRon’s kids are older than mine so she ends up playing chauffer to various sports and after school extracurricular activities.

She goes on to explain that it’s tough, that she’s not in bed before midnight most nights, which implies that she resumes working once the kids go to bed. She credits the support she gets from her husband, who “wrangles the kids in the morning” (breakfast, school/camp drop-off), so she can start her workday no later than 7.

LiRon loves the flexibility of her job and the fact that she never has to explain why she needs the afternoon off. I love that too. After all, before I became my own boss, I had a boss who wrote me a nasty email when I left work early because my son was rushed to the emergency room. I quit on the spot. Now, if I have to run out, I don’t need to excuse myself - to anyone. With my day cut short, I also get some of my work done at night.

LiRon feels that by taking a break and making that “hard stop” at 3, she is able to recharge for working later on.

But cleaning – the bane of my existence! – What about cleaning?! LiRon doesn’t mention anything about fitting in time to clean, but Brandy Yearous, a stay-at-home mother of two writing a fitness book for women who don’t have the time or money for the gym, does. She says that she allots an hour after breakfast for pure, unadulterated and uninterrupted cleaning time.

I consider this: My morning is too hectic. I don’t have an hour before or after breakfast to clean because it’s all super-rushed before we get in the car. When I return from driving my kids, I need to glue my butt to the desk chair and check deadline-driven reporter queries posted to various PR services. I’m too afraid to miss a potential opportunity in the busy morning hours. Alas, the morning cleaning hour won’t work for me. Morning is prime business time.

Cynthia Powell, owner of home-based business Chicks & Cubs (http://www.chicksandcubs.com/) is a work-at-home mom of three kids, who manages her time by using a timer. I like her approach because for the ADD folks like me who also require breaks for the sake of their dry computer eyes, it prevents boredom, lethargy and discomfort by mixing up the routine.

“I set my timer for 15-20 minutes,” she explains. “In that amount of time, I work on the computer for my business. When the timer goes off, I reset it, go to work in the kitchen or wherever in the house. Timer goes off, I reset it and go back to business again.”

Sounds like a game of musical chairs? Cynthia says this strategy keeps her focused, gives her necessary breaks, and assures that she works on the business and the house. I’m going to try it. Now, must locate that timer.

Cynthia also uses what she calls a “check off sheet” for each day of the week.

I call this a “to do list” but tomato tomahhhto - the fact that bible and prayer are at the top of Cynthia’s list, with exercise a close third, is admirable in and of itself.

Her list reads like this:

Bible
Prayer
Exercise
Dishes
Laundry

Then, each day of the week consists of a house task and an important business task:

Monday: Mop Kitchen, Shoe Bronzing Orders
Tuesday: Change Sheets, Web Link Exchanges
Wednesday: Bathrooms, Detailed Paperwork

Cynthia’s list is impressive: Not only does she fit in time for exercise and shoe-bronzing, she finds time to be religious. Maybe it is Cynthia’s faith that carries her along and because of that, G-D grants her the miracle of getting it all done.

Note to self: I haven’t got a prayer.

After email threads and discussions with these 75 women, one recurrent piece of advice rings through repeatedly:

“Lower your Standards.”

For some, like Tara Bloom, a divorced mom of an 11 year old daughter who manages online maternity and baby business Maternitique.com, those “standards” apply to the definition of “clean home.”

For others like Atlanta-based freelance journalist and mom Paige Bowers (www.paigebowers.com), the standards apply to quantitative workload: “Learning to say no has been a major thing for me,” she says. “Understanding that my priorities are my family, friends and writing career helps drive a lot of the decisions I make. If it doesn't fit, then I don't commit.”

For stay-at-home mom Sophie Sacca, lowering standards means not being so hard on her self, and setting aside “me time” which for her includes playing piano, reading a novel and deep relaxation.

For Caryn Sabes Hacker, a psychotherapist and Director of Marketing at Suracell Inc.(www.agebetternow.com), it’s about taking the best possible care of herself. “I credit Suracell’s nutritional supplements for my energy and concentration today,” chuckles the mom whose kids are now grown, “but my commitment to daily exercise and taking time to unwind in the early morning always got me through the work day when the kids were young. Setting aside the time for physical activity and meditation complements my healthy lifestyle and is what still gets me through a multitude of daily assignments.” When that’s not enough for Caryn, she breaks everything down into groups of 20: handling 20 pieces of paper on the desk, putting away 20 dishes or 20 pieces of clothing. She advises other moms to do the same, saying: “Turn the big job into lots of little jobs and spread that throughout a very long day.”

For publicist Renee Glick, lowering standards is about not expecting herself to be everywhere at once. Instead of going to the store, she orders groceries, shoes and clothing for herself and the kids via the Internet. She pays her bills and does her banking online as well.

Still, others stressed that discipline is essential for how they do it all: “Discipline is key,” stresses work-at-home mom and professional writer Janice Rice, who toils away from the moment her two grade school kids walk out the door at 7:30 a.m. until 2 p.m., when she goes to pick them up. “During that time, I focus on my professional work—not on laundry or cleaning my house. I try to leave the hours between 2 and 9 p.m. open for kids and home activities, and then round out my work day between 9 and midnight. I figure the tradeoff is worth the flexibility, and I’ve discovered—as has every new mom—that the human body can accommodate a different schedule.”

Pediatric nurse mom duo the “Moms on Call,” which consists of Jennifer Walker, RN, BSN and Laura Hunter, LPN burn the midnight oil many nights. From their cheery dispositions when I ask about my son’s chronic diaper rash, it seems they don’t get tired. It helps that they were trained as pediatric nurses. Always on the go, with eight children between them (including a set of twins each!), they shuffle between consultations with frazzled new parents, teaching toddler seminars (go to http://www.themomsoncall.com/ and you can catch one online) and answering parents’ questions via email.

Next to a smiling picture of Laura from the “Moms on Call” web site are the words “Laura is a juggler – she juggles life (can you relate?)”

Kelly Robbins of The Copywriting Institute (http://www.thecopywritinginstitute.com/) writes to me from her home office: She’s determined to make family time strictly family time, and offers this pithy suggestion that I’ll take most to heart:

“When the kids are in school, don’t screw around.”

Shira Weiss is a WAHM (Work At Home Mom) in Teaneck, NJ. Though not an “Alpha Mom” yet – she’s planning on taking tips from all 75 women into consideration - and working on it!

Call it Sleepless

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 10:47:00 +0000

Rachel Dorfman can’t sleep. It’s time to nurse 6-week-old Brady again. Samantha, 2, will be up soon wanting to play. How will she keep up with her lively daughter, Rachel wonders. How will she soon return to work?

A relatable dilemma: Fussy babies, hungry babies, curious toddlers and beyond; once you’re a mother there’s no looking back. Weekends are barely discernable from week days. Going out bar hopping on a random night, one that starts at 10, is something (you must remind yourself) you actually used to do. If only you knew then what you know now, you could have hibernated, storing sleep in reserve. You’re in a different stage of life, and, to quote a sleazy mattress rep I once knew “Sleep is the new sex.”

According to the National Center of Sleep Disorders Research, sleep disorders add an estimated $15.9 billion to the annual national health care bill.

Vincent Giampapa, MD says benefits of adequate sleep should not be underestimated; it is one of the most important components of healthy aging. He writes in The Gene Makeover: The 21st Century Anti-Aging Breakthrough:

“It is during sleep that our body repairs most of the cell damage. It is also during sleep that key hormones are released that repair damage to DNA.”

Giampapa discusses the importance of core nutrients during this time of stress, through diet and supplementation, to help fight off bacteria, viruses, pollution, toxins and environmental stressors.

According to Joshua Rotenberg, MD, a San Antonio neurologist specializing in sleep disorders, "curing sleep disorders will have the greatest effect of any public-health measure in terms of adding productive years to life."

Rotenberg spent ten years in the Air Force studying the impact of sleep deficit on military personnel. “Sleep loss is detrimental to health and brain function,” he says. “Acute sleep loss can cause slow reaction speed, memory problems and “microsleeps” (“nodding off” quickly, often without even realizing it), which can lead to dangerous consequences when driving. Chronic sleep loss has been also linked to psychiatric symptoms, higher levels of stress, anxiety and depression, risk-taking behavior and impaired moral reasoning.”

Diabetes, cardiovascular disease and depression are among the long-term outcomes linked to chronic sleep restriction.

It’s widely known that obesity has been linked to sleep deprivation, but did you know that one study linked lack of sleep to retaining weight post-partum?[1]

This might explain the difficulty for some to shed pregnancy pounds, but Andrea Reed, a first-time mom at 36, had the opposite experience.

“I was overweight before pregnancy,” she says, “I lost all of that plus the pregnancy weight now that I’m a sleep deprived, working mom.” Reed explains that exhaustion makes her incredibly shaky, nauseous and unable to eat. “The one thing I have to be thankful for is the weight loss…oh, and another; Christian Dior concealer to hide the eggplants under my eyes.”

The author of Snooze…or Lose! Ten ‘No-War’ Ways to Improve Your Teen’s Sleep Habits, Helene Emsellem, MD, recommends 7-9 hours of sleep for adults. With many a new mom averaging 5 hours per night, it’s no wonder we’re feeling irritable, cranky and picking ridiculous spats with our spouses.

Dr. Rotenberg suggests napping during the day and if you don’t have the luxury of a long siesta, a catnap should suffice. He refers to a study of NASA scientists that showed the positive effects of a short nap on alertness and response time in pilots.[2]

Renee Fellows, 39, started her marketing business seven years ago after the birth of her second son.

“Sleep? Who sleeps?” she asks. “I burn the candle at all ends and occasionally find four or five hours a night.”

Fellows recuperates by making up for lost sleep over the weekends. It’s not just managing kids and early carpooling that cause her to skimp on slumber. She’s addicted to technology for work, emailing and typing up computerized reports at night.

Dr. Jacob Teitelbaum, MD, author of From Fatigued to Fantastic! confirms that there is merit to “catching up” on sleep over the weekend.

He recommends a number of quick energy boosters that people can do to feel better when tired, including going outside for a walk (exercise with sunshine can boost energy) and making sure one stays adequately hydrated.

He also gives the following acupressure tip: “rub your ears between your thumb and first finger for 10 to 15 seconds. This stimulates all of your acupuncture meridians and will actually give you an energy burst for a while.”

Both Teitelbaum and Giampapa advocate for a cup of green tea over coffee, saying that the former gives an energy boost minus anxiety. Green tea also contains theanine, which will give you a calm sensation while caffeine in the tea leaves you feeling energized. Green tea’s powerful antioxidants help fight free-radicals that cause our cells to weaken and age. The less sleep, the more stress and the more damage to our cells and increased chance of illness.

Additionally, Rotenberg explains that because some individuals are slow metabolizers of caffeine, the short term fix from strong coffee can worsen the following night. Other side effects of caffeine excess include anxiety, irritability, tremulousness, and insomnia. Caffeine also crosses into breast milk, and nursing babies whose mothers consume 600 mg or more a day (an 8 oz. cup of coffee has 80 to 150 mg) may be irritable and have trouble sleeping.

As for staring at a computer screen like Fellows, here’s a quick fact: We sleep on average 90 minutes less than we did before the invention of the light bulb!
A survey by the National Sleep Foundation shows people are spending an average of 4.5 hours each week working from home, on top of a 9.5 hour average work day. While 28 percent of people questioned in the survey said daytime sleepiness interferes with their daily activities, 63 percent said they are likely to accept their tiredness and keep going.
Renee Fellows says she falls into this category, but Giampapa recommends “breaking from the Blackberry” by making the conscious effort to end one’s day at a certain time. Focusing too heavily on work can elevate stress which could lead to excess levels of cortisol, the stress hormone and the prescription for premature aging.
Here are more tips from the experts on setting the stage for better sleep:
- Keep to a regular sleep schedule, says Scott Hall, MD, Diplomat of the American Board of Sleep Medicine. “Do not vary your wake up time too much day to day. This can cause trouble with your circadian rhythm when you need to get to sleep at a certain time the next night.”
Exercise helps sleep as long as it is not done within 4 hours of bedtime, he adds.
- Say no to Coffee, Alcohol and Cigarettes: Hall advises his patients to avoid caffeinated products after noon, and to avoid alcohol right before bedtime. “Alcohol can have the effect of helping people go to sleep, but it can cause rebound insomnia after a couple of hours of sleep.”
- Avoid nicotine, adds Elizabeth Lombardo, Ph.D., a psychologist specializing in sleep disorders. Nicotine is a stimulant that’s just as disruptive to sleep as coffee or alcohol, not to mention the other known health hazards.
- Create a “Sleep Friendly” Bedroom:
Invest in high quality sheets, says Candita Clayton, professional organizer and author of Clean Your Home Healthy: Green Cleaning Made Easy. “Nothing is more restful than a little luxury. Considering you spend a third of your life in bed, it's worth it.”

Lose the clutter, she adds, explaining that when surrounded by too many things, her clients feel compelled to do something else (like clean!) when they should be sleeping.

She also recommends using a plant as a natural air freshener and to enhance the bedroom décor.

- Follow a wind-down routine to help you relax before bedtime, says Lombardo. “Take a warm shower, listen to relaxing music with the lights dimmed, read…Relaxing the mind before getting into bed can help decrease stressful thoughts.”

Giampapa recommends meditating before bed: A study he conducted at the Monroe Institute in Faber, Virginia, showed that meditation increases key hormones like DHEA and melatonin, a key ingredient for proper sleep.

- Your Mattress Matters: “Constant tossing and turning is one of the leading inhibitors of a sound sleep, and often stems from the uncomfortable pressure points created by a mattress,” says Dr. Vaughn McCall, board certified in Sleep Medicine, a Fellow of the American Academy of Sleep Medicine and member of the Sealy Orthopedic Advisory Board. “Many manufacturers are designing mattresses with technology to alleviate pressure points, like Sealy’s new Posturepedic Innerspring line. Additionally, eliminating sound and light, removing pets from the bed and optimizing the bedroom temperature are necessary first steps to getting a better night’s sleep.’”

- Good Sleep Health from the Inside Out: Giampapa says that part of the approach to good sleep is getting in proper nutrients while awake. Aside from healthy eating, he recommends separate nutritional supplements for day and night. He formulated the Suracell line of am and pm core supplements, customized to the individual’s genetic health for better aging – and part of aging well? Sleeping better!

The reason for different combinations in the A.M. and P.M., he explains, is to regulate the autonomic nervous system responsible for our biological clock. This way, we’re alert during the day and calm for sleep at night.

And finally, if you’ve taken the above measures, but like Dorfman, you’re still tossing and turning, Lombardo suggests adopting Dale Carnegie’s strategy:

“If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying,” he said. “It's the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep.”

[1] Gunderson EP, Rifas-Shiman SL, Oken E, Rich-Edwards JW, Kleinman KP, Taveras EM, Gillman MW. Association of fewer hours of sleep at 6 months postpartum with substantial weight retention at 1 year postpartum. Am J Epidemiol . 2008 Jan 15;167(2):178-87. Epub 2007 Oct 29
[2] Rosekind, M.R., Graeber, R.C., Dinges, D.F., Connell, L.J., Rountree, M.S., Spinweber, C.L., & Gillen, K.A. Crew Factors in Flight Operations IX: Effects of Planned Cockpit Rest on Crew Performance and Alertness in Long-Haul Operations. NASA Technical Memorandum 108839. Moffett Field, CA: NASA Ames Research Center. 1994.

Pediatrics: Fifth's Disease

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 22:11:00 +0000

Fifth's disease is aptly named as it was the fifth rash that was discovered. It is a very contagious condition characterized by a rash that has a "slapped cheek" appearance on the face and sometimes a lacey pink rash on the torso. It is important to note that fifth's disease is well tolerated in children but can be quite dangerous to mothers in their first trimester of pregnancy. It has been known(albeit rarely) to cause miscarriage or fetal death. So any pregnant mother in her first trimester who becomes exposed should alert her doctor immediately. Children who get it will get fussy for a day or two prior to the onset of the rash and then be right back to normal shortly thereafter.

This tidbit brought to you by Jennifer Walker RN BSN pediatric nurse, parenting consultant and co-founder of momsoncall.com where you can find more information about "what's going around" in pediatric circles.

The Smartest Thing I Did This Year

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 14:30:00 +0000

This past January, I decided to fully commit to Weiss Media Group, Inc., a firm which I started in 2001 but was not committed to full time. I did this after leaving a job where (suffice it to say) managerial ethics raised large and looming question marks in my mind. My conscience would have it no longer. I moved on. Becoming my own boss and starting my own firm was the best thing I could possibly do. Thank G-D, this has not only been a more financially profitable endeavor, but one that gives me peace of mind. I trust myself to get the job done and I do not have to answer to anyone else's ridiculous demands, or question - along with my poor, stressed-out colleagues - whether or not they are lying or truthful. I can pick and choose the clients that I prefer to work with and have done so wisely. I can properly set expectations rather than strive to fulfill impossibly unrealistic promises. I can eat lunch at my desk or spend the lunch time on my exercise bike. If I have to run to a doctor's appointment for a feverish child, I don't get chastised. No matter, I put in a full work day every day and when I don't (due to client meetings or a childcare related scenario), I 100% make it up in the evenings or on weekends. Above all else, I thank G-D again as I say: I'm truly happy to go to work each morning!

"Palin" in Comparison

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 12:23:00 +0000

My husband was watching Sarah Palin give her speech last night. The feedback was that she had an incredible speech writer and her delivery was spectacular. I noticed two main things, since I tuned in towards the end: 1) She has SIX children and a baby, quite impressive for a VP nominee. She has her hands full and clearly will have two jobs while in office if McCain is elected. 2) She looks like me. Yes, you read me right. She looks like me. My jaw, which is entirely unique has been transplanted on her 40something face. Those glasses are similar to a pair I used to sport, although now I am trendier in Prada and the like (I have 6 pairs, since I abandoned contacts years ago due to extreme dry eye on my left side). I would like to hear from other women: Do you look like Palin? Send me a photo. We'll have lunch, form a FaceBook group, do impersonations in Vegas. Also, Tina Fey clearly has to play her on Saturday night live - but I hear Tina left (it's been a long time since I watched that show), so I guess we'll have to tune in and find out which newbie will play her. On the subject of politics, I'm staying completely mum.(In photo: Me)

Project Forgiveness (projectforgiveness.blogspot.com)

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 02:33:00 +0000

See my witty submission to Project Forgiveness, an initiative of the National Jewish Outreach Program. For more information, check out projectforgiveness.blogspot.com. (Hey, we all have something to be sorry about. YOU KNOW who I am talking to. Yes, YOU.)

Photo credits: Some man's daughter.

August 14, 2008

I'm sorry to Jennifer, Brad, Angelina, et al.I'm sorry for my fascination with your lives, when they really are just that, YOUR lives and not anyone else's business.Whether you swap BFs or BFFs, shave your head, refuse to wear underwear, or get arrested for DUI, it's your prerogative.
I'm sorry that the minutia of your daily existence pervades my weekend reading, and that the horrible paparazzo shot (sans makeup) makes me feel better on my darkest day. I'm sorry that I'm addicted to your melodramas like a couch potato to a bad soap opera. I'll try to understand that celebrities are real people too.

Whoops, I did it again - I bought US Weekly.

Woman to Woman Guidance for Observant Jewish Women

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 02:07:00 +0000

Women to Women Guidance for Observant Jews (photo source: Nishmat, caption: A Yoetzet Halacha offering support via the Yoetzot Halacha hotline)

Issues of Jewish family law are so private and sensitive that some observant Jewish women have questions they keep to themselves. Preferring to “play it safe” rather than ask their rabbi, these women often miss out on a simple answer or ruling that isn’t as stringent as they would assume. In other instances, they may not realize the need to be more stringent in specific areas of Halacha (Jewish law).

Recently, rabbis in Israel and throughout North America have partnered with Yoatzot Halacha, women certified by a panel of Orthodox rabbis to serve as a resource for other women with questions regarding taharat hamishpachah (Jewish family purity law - an area of Jewish Law that relates to marriage, sexuality and women's health).

This role was devised to assist women who are more comfortable discussing very personal issues with another woman rather than with a male rabbinical advisor.
The Yoatzot keep all questions in complete confidence and always consult with a rabbi for questions that require a rabbinic ruling.

Women preparing to become Yoatzot Halacha are chosen for their extensive Torah scholarship, leadership ability, and deep religious commitment. They devote two years (over 1000 hours) to intensive study with rabbinic authorities in Jewish family law.

Yoatzot Halacha receive training from experts in modern medicine, psychology, gynecology, infertility, women's health, family dynamics and sexuality.

To date, Yoatzot Halacha have helped thousands of women enhance their observance of taharat hamishpacha, and find solutions in the areas of women’s health and family law.

Nishmat, The Jerusalem Center for Advanced Torah Study for Women, graduated the first Yoatzot Halacha in 2000. Today, over 50 Yoatzot Halacha currently service Jewish communities in Israel and North America.

The success of programs in Riverdale, NY, Silver Spring, MD and Northern NJ has led to a new larger initiative: Starting this coming fall, Yoetzet Halacha will serve various Manhattan congregations and offer unique programs (i.e. “Health & Halacha Day”, scholars-in residence weekend) to women there.

The concept of Yoatzot Halacha is widely gaining acceptance and generating interest throughout Orthodox communities in North America and Israel.

To find out more about the success of Yoatzot Halacha and how they are helping observant Jewish women, contact Shira Weiss, Weiss Media Group, for Nishmat’s Miriam Glaubach Center, sweiss@weissmediagroup.com, 917 282 9317.
###
Yoatzot Halacha (who speak Hebrew and English) can be reached through http://www.yoatzot.org/ or via the following telephone numbers:

Nishmat's Golda Koschitzky Women's Halachic HotlineIn Israel: 02-640-4343Outside Israel: +972-2-640-4343Toll free from the United States and Canada: 1-877-YOETZET (1-877-963-8938)

The hotline is provided by Nishmat as a public service. The toll free call is a public service contributed by IDT Corporation, a multinational provider of telecom, Internet, and video services.

Hours - Israel timeSunday - Thursday: 18:00 - 24:00Friday: 8:00 - 12:00Saturday night: ½ hour after Shabbat is over to midnight.

For further information about Nishmat's programs, visit http://www.nishmat.net/ or email me, Shira Weiss, sweiss@weissmediagroup.com. I am the PR contact.

Stop Polluting the Most Beautiful of All Lands on this Earth!

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 20:58:00 +0000

This comes from the blog of Zalul, Israel's Environmental Association, dated July 28th (Photo courtesy of Zalul):

Spotted today along the Yarkon River from Tel Aviv’s port by Zalul’s Deputy Director, Sagit Rogenstein, Israeli policemen dumping what they described as “sand” into the River. She took this picture with her cellphone before running over to find out what was going on since any and all dumping of solid waste into the Yarkon (and all of Israel’s rivers, for that matter) is illegal unless you hold a permit, which is essentially impossible to get.

Pretending that they didn’t hear her yelling and then locking the gate behind them from where they accessed the river bank only made the situation more suspicious. Finally, when it was impossible for them to ignore her any longer, they denied they were doing anything wrong and claimed that it was private police business.

Zalul has the photographs, name of the detective doing the dumping, and the car license plate number and will be continuing the investigation into this mysterious and suspicious activity.

Eye on Your Health: From WINK TV

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 15:22:00 +0000

Eye on your Health: Gene makeover
By Jennifer Stacy
Story Created: Jun 16, 2008 at 5:18 PM EDT
Story Updated: Jun 16, 2008 at 5:38 PM EDT

NAPLES, Fla. - Is the fountain of youth found inside your genes? That's the theory behind a new concept from authors who know first hand the ravages of time.

The nationally renowned physicians, including a Plastic Surgeon and an Orthopedic Surgeon, came up with a wellness plan and book using new technology, and basic-but personalized health principles.If you knew your genetic deck of cards, could you improve your odds of health? That's the concept behind "The Gene Makeover," a book co-authored by Dr. Fred Buechel of Naples.

"The Gene Makeover" book is used in conjunction with a simple DNA test that can be done at home. Swab your cheek, seal the contents, and ship them to a vitamin company called Suracell. Your results arrive in several weeks, and the total cost is around $250.

"If you know you have a predisposition based on genetic testing, for example, if you have snip for cancer of one type or another, then that will come out in the test. " Explains Dr. Buechel.

"Then you can say 'what are the nutrients I can use to turn my genes back on to keep me healthier longer?'"For around $70 dollars a month, the Suracell company offers personalized vitamins based on unique health predispositions and deficiencies identified in the gene test.Dr. Buechel says the gene makeover approach far exceeds a daily multi-vitamin, promoting optimal health at a personalized, cellular level.

"Most people that stay on the program tend to lose weight, they end up looking better, their skin gets firmer they look healthier, they feel better, their mind gets sharper." Says Dr. Buechel. "We don't have to be slaves to our genes anymore, we can take control of our genes and optimize them so that we can move ahead in a positive way."

Rave Reviews for The Gene Makeover Approach:

“Suracell's PM Genetic Formula is the best! I've never slept as well as I do now. It helps my body de-stress and recover from everything that I do to it each and every day!” - Lori Gerbereux, Personal Trainer, Nutritional Counselor, Professional Body Builder

“I feel great on the program. I feel much more energized. I especially love the bone and joint vitamins. I have noticed that the pain in my joints when I run has stopped since I began the program. “- Kassandra Coronis

“I always recommend the program to my patients. I have found that after surgeries it helps with healing time.” -Dr William Boss, Hackensack Hospital

“Since I have begun the program a few months ago I have found an improvement in my skin and hair. I have also noticed better mental alertness and more energy.” - Amanda Larsen

LINKS:http://www.thegenemakeover.com/http://www.suracell.com/

Beating the Bloat

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 00:21:00 +0000

Why do we bloat? We all have food intolerances of sorts and we may not realize what the particular "trigger" food is, but here are some tips from the British site GoodToKnow.co.uk:

Limit 'windy' foods
Some people produce more gas than others, while others are simply more sensitive to the sensations its produces. Either way, go easy with any sort of beans. They contain large amounts of raffinose, a type of sugar that's fermented into gas. Take care with cabbage, Brussels sprouts and spicy foods, too.

Don't chew gum
Chewing introduces air onto your gut so you're more liable to bloat. Go for sugar free mints instead, though you should limit anything sweetened with sorbitol, or any other sweetener ending in 'ol', as bowel bacteria ferment this family of chemicals into more gas.

Drink plenty
It seems strange to take in more fluid when you're already bloated, but if you're suffering from water retention, drinking lots of water stimulates your kidneys to work harder and flush out excess liquids.

Ease off the salt
Salt attracts fluid, which can make you blow up, especially around the time of your period. Replace salt with other seasonings like pepper, herbs, lemon and balsamic vinegar. Avoid packaged foods with more than 1.25g salt per 100g.

Boost your fiber
Constipation can also cause bloating. For perfectly functioning bowels you need a variety of fiber sources to include insoluble fiber such as wholemeal bread and brown rice, and soluble such as fruit and veg, beans and oats.

Eat dairy
Boost your calcium intake with two to three servings of low fat milk or yogurt daily, as long as you're not intolerant. As well as being good for bones, calcium has been shown to reduce fluid retention associated with pre-menstrual syndrome.

Take friendly bacteria
Friendly bacteria or probiotics can reduce the bloating that's linked with an irritable bowel and other symptoms such as stomach pain and intermittent diarrhea and constipation.

Try a magnesium supplement
200mg of magnesium significantly reduced fluid retention after two menstrual cycles of daily use, according to a study at the University of Reading. Food sources of the mineral include nuts, green vegetables and whole grains.

Watch the fizz
Carbonated drinks, even sparkling water, can increase you chance of bloating. It's best to stick to still fluids instead.

Don't rule out a food intolerance
Bloating, can sometimes indicate you aren't tolerating certain foods well with likely culprits being wheat and dairy. Try two weeks without dairy products first and if your symptoms settle you may have nailed the problem. If there's no improvement then restart dairy products but cut out wheat and see what happens. Another approach is to keep a food diary for a couple of weeks, noting everything what you eat and drink and when bloating troubles you most. But don't delete food groups long term without advice from a registered dietitian. You can ask to be referred by your GP.

Knowing your DNA To Age Better

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Tue, 02 Sep 2008 20:11:00 +0000

People have asked me: What is Suracell exactly? And how can taking a DNA test help one to age better? Here's the 411 on Suracell:

Suracell's DNA test is different from the offerings from Companies such as 23andMe and Navigenics in that Suracell's program looks only at personal genetic characteristics directlyrelated to healthy aging.

Suracell's proprietary DNA analysis looks at 27 SNP's (single nuclear polymorphisms) related to five critical biological processes that research shows impact on how healthfully we age. These processes are: Methylation (turning on and off of genes related to cardiovascular health), control of blood sugar , inflammation, and oxidative stress, plus the maintenance of normal DNA repair.

Inefficient DNA repair leads to increasing poor quality copies of cells as they replicate and can be associated with many of the negative changes associated with aging.

This personal genetic profile is then analyzed in conjunction with a personal questionnaire that evaluates diet, exercise, family history, lifestyle and environment and a urine biomarker test that provides a real-time snapshot of how effectively the body is managing DNA repair and oxidative stress.

The result is a specific recommendation for dietary supplements that includes Core Nutrition AM and PM (general support for all 5 processes, along with comprehensive twice-a-day nutritional support) and from one to five "Repair" formulas in either regular or extra strength.

The Repair formulas provide concentrated support for those processes that the DNA and supporting tests show need extra nutritional support.

Suracell is the only company offering a specific focus on healthy aging and a comprehensive supplement program focused on supporting the key biological processes that impact directly on how healthfully we age. It is also the only program that utilizes a urine biomarker analysis as a means to periodically assess the patient's status and adjust the supplement program accordingly. The Suracell program was developed by Anti-aging pioneer Dr. Vincent Giampapa MD in collaboration with a highly respected team of PhD geneticists and molecular biologists.

Tips for Parents of Toddlers - From Jennifer Walker, "Moms on Call"

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 01:42:00 +0000

Whining
This is just a way that toddlers learn to communicate with us that gets the desired result. It will decrease if it does not produce the desired result.

What to say:
Very calm and matter-of-fact “I do not speak whinese, when you talk to me in a calm, soft voice, like I am using now, then I can help you.”
You may have to repeat this several times. If they are strong willed, then this may turn into a tantrum in an effort to have their own way and get your attention. See tantrum instructions below
If your child continues to whine after being told three times that you do not speak whinese. Then you can move on to the three point teaching technique:
#1 I do not want you to whine,
#2 If you continue to speak that way, you will go into your room for quiet playtime and come out when you are ready to speak in a way that I can understand, (you may insert your own disciplinary technique here)
#3 I want you to speak in your regular sweet voice so I can understand what you are saying.”

If the whining continues then off to the bedroom it is. If this induces a tantrum see tantrum instructions.

What to do:
Between awake and asleep go over the household rules (Obey Daddy and Mommy, Do not hurt yourself and Do not hurt others - those are our three household rules) and tell her something she did right and then tell her about the whining. Tell her that it is frustrating for you when she uses a whiny voice because you cannot understand her and you love the sound of her regular voice. Ask her to say a few things is her regular sweet voice and tell her how much you love to hear that sweet voice, her voice. And then tell her that you will look forward to hearing her sweet voice in the morning.

The “No” stage
Asserting one’s free will is a normal developmental milestone. The good news is if your child is saying “no” frequently, then they are right on track developmentally. The bad news is that it can be frustrating and requires great patience.

What to say:
Every time your toddler says “No” you say “Not “No”, “yes Ma’am (or sir) and do it” Then help them to do what you have asked of them.

What to do:
We cannot do a three point teaching technique every time our child says “no”. We would have no time left in the day at all. What we want to do is to use this time to prepare them for later in their development. This will not make the “no” stop, it will just reset their thinking so that in the future (like after you have said this about 3 million times and they are 3-4 years old) they will automatically know the proper response and they WILL start to respond to it. This is just a learning opportunity. We can use this time to instill the wanted response, which will carry them right into pre-teen years. You will get to the point where they will say “No”. You will raise an eyebrow and they will say “Yes Ma’am” and do it.

Tantrums

If you want a behavior to continue, pay attention to it.

What it is:
Tantrums are a show and this show is all for you. They only continue if they are effective. So if you want your child to have repeated tantrums, then give in. If you would like tantrums to stop, then ignore them.

What to say:
Say “Not in this house” or “We don’t play that” Calmly and firmly.

What to do:
Then place the child in a safe environment and walk away. This will elicit louder screaming at first but do not give in. They can settle down and they will if they do not get any response from you. They learn pretty quickly whether tantrums will work, so ignoring them will ‘nip this in the bud’. It is never too late to start ignoring this behavior. Tantrums need to be ignored. This is not a teachable moment. It is not time to do a three point teaching technique.

When “placing them in a safe environment” they may go double-jointed on you and slip right out of your grasp when you go to pick them up. You can then grasp them firmly at the waist and place them under your arm in a sideways position to carry them to a safe place. Do this silently. You must stay in control and act as if this does not affect you in any way. Place them in a safe area and walk away. Remember, this is not a teachable moment.

If I want to address tantrums between awake and asleep: Try this every night for about a week.

“Our three household rules are Obey Mommy and Daddy, Do not hurt yourself and Do not hurt others. Today you obeyed Mommy by _________________(fill in blank) And…today you had a fit and yelled and screamed and that hurts you and mommy when you behave that way. But I know that you do not have to behave that way because you can listen and do what mommy asks. You can be great at obeying me, that’s just how you are,.I love you, good-night.”

Head banger? This method will decrease the overall number of times your child’s head hits the floor. If we give in, then they will do this more often because they will know that it works. Then, the cumulative number of times the head hits the floor will increase exponentially.

Going out to eat

Toddlers have about a 10-15 minute mealtime tolerance window. So we do not expect them to sit indefinitely while we enjoy long conversation and two cups of coffee. We can, however, make going out to eat a more enjoyable experience.

What to say:
Children want to know what you expect and what will happen. Some misbehavior is because they have no idea how long this may last so they want out immediately.
Prior to going into the restaurant, while you are still in the car say this.
“We are going in to eat. Here is what will happen,
We will sit down at the table and you can play with your __________(fill in blank)
Then we order our food and just before the food comes, we will take a little walk
Then the food comes and we eat and when we are done you can play some more and we will leave.
Don’t forget our household rules apply here.
Obey Daddy and Mommy,
Do not hurt yourself and do not hurt others.”

What to do:
Ask the waiter to let you know a few minutes before the food is supposed to arrive, if you tell them that this will help your toddler not to have a meltdown, they are usually quite eager to accommodate the request. Then let things follow the plan that you state above. Right before the food comes, take your child for a little walk. You can go to the potty, you can go outside and look at the shrubs that are planted outside or you can take a little tour and show your toddler where you go to pay, what door the waiters go thru to get the food and point out interesting things like light fixtures or wall art. Then go back to your seat and finish your mealtime.
Remember that toddlers will not tolerate endless conversation. So if you want to go out for a long discussion and several cups of coffee, get a babysitter.

Fast Food
If you are going to a fast food restaurant that has a play yard then let your child play first. This is a great spot for you to relax and allow your child to play. Do not get into a power play over three chicken nuggets and force your child to eat them before going on the playground. The food often comes in a box or bag so you can take it home and eat it later. If you are saying to yourself that your child would not eat unless you make them eat first, then read on. It does not matter if your child misses out on three chicken nuggets and some fries. Have a nutritious dinner that night or let them snack on the fries on the way home. Do not sit them right next to children having fun on a playground and force them to eat fried foods. Let them play and take the food with you when you go.

Going to the Grocery Store
Going to the grocery store can be incredibly frustrating with one toddler, throw in a few more children and it could be chaos. Children want to know what to expect and what is expected of them.

What to say: In the car prior to entering the grocery store remind the children what will happen. “We are going into the grocery store and I want you to ride in the cart without complaint. I want you to help me pick out some foods because you are a great helper. If Mommy says :no: it means :No . Our household rules apply here. Obey Mommy and Daddy, Do not hurt yourself and do not hurt others. That means no screaming and no whining. Let’s have fun. I like being at the store with you.”
While in the store you can say “You get what you get and you don’t pitch a fit” (That is the official southern version).

What to do:
First of all, place your child in the proper seat. It is not advisable to allow your toddler to walk thru the store on their own. They may want to get down but if we can enlist their help right away, they will often stay put. Pick up colorful vegetables and ask them which one. Drive the buggy close enough to the produce so they can pick out an apple and drop it in the bag. Select two cans of green beans and let your toddler pick one. Make them a part of the process. If you have coupons, let them help you to look for the color product that matches the coupon. When you say “no” mean it and move on.

Remember if your toddler cries, it is more likely that other people understand then it is that they are annoyed. Either way, you are not responsible for strangers, you are responsible for your child and if your refusal to get sugary snacks elicits a tantrum, just move on and continue shopping as if nothing is happening. If you give in to the crying or tantrum then you are teaching your toddler to continue that behavior - because it works. A few trips to the grocery store where their tantrums do not change your behavior will improve the overall experience in the long run. And we have to go here at least once a week, so be careful.

These tidbits brought to you compliments of The Moms on Call On-Line Toddler Parenting Seminar at http://www.momsoncall.com/. Written by Jennifer Walker RN BSN mother or three, pediatric nurse, author, public speker and parenting consultant.

It's High Time for Tea, Goodbye "Lazy Bean"!

sweiss@weissmediagroup.com (Shira Hirschman Weiss) — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 02:00:00 +0000

Now I will see if any of you are actually reading my blog: If you know me, you know that I drank lots of coffee and frequented joints like Lazy Bean, where North Jersyers flock to like mad for addictive caffeinated granules in frozen form, with lots of sweet attached. I have cut out coffee entirely. I don't own coffee in my house anymore and I bought several different types of tea to make the switch. I want to see if it makes a difference in my skin over time (according to renowned dermatologist Nicholas Perricone, MD), coffee is a no-no when it comes to wrinkle wreckage. I also want to see if my migraines are fewer and farther between as a result. I find that coffee makes my heart race and makes me feel a little anxious too. If I go above 2 cups, I shake like a leaf. Write to me if you experience the same. Coffee, tea or me? I'll take the latter two of the 3.